A talk with Tad Hargrave part 2: Tone-policing and moving beyond right-wrong

  In part 2 of our recorded video chat, me and Tad discussed the issue of tone-policing and how we can move beyond binaries of right and wrong to navigate emotionally charged discussions around subjects such as race. You can check out part 1 here. About Tad Hargrave Tad runs marketingforhippies.com for work and write essays…

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Calling to: A proposal for an alternative communication protocol in social change communities

Since it’s pilot stages, the Authentic Allyship Coaching Group, a program I founded to support white allies in cultivating allyship based on the principles of healthy relating, has been intentionally held as a call-out (or even call-in) free space. I set this initial guideline for the group because I felt that it was extremely important…

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A talk with Tad Hargrave Part1: healing white masculinity and the intersection between personal and cultural attachment trauma

Context This video is centered around healing white masculinity. Related to this, we both understand that it is a slippery slope when men (although I identify as non-binary) come together to speak about misogyny and feminism. I also want to let the view know that I recognize that body-centred healing around cultural trauma is something…

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Dear white people: It’s your white privilege to react with anger to my compassion-based approach

One of the most surprising things to me when I first started publicizing my allyship nurturance work, which is based on the fundamental idea that allyship starts with an allyship to self, is angry opposition from white people. And I am not talking about white nationalists. I have yet to be spoken at aggressively by…

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The reality of white anger and why we need healing spaces for white people

I’m writing this post today as I was beginning to launch my Authentic Allyship Coaching Group, a support program for white allies who are committed to healing their personal and cultural traumas. I had just announced the end of the test phase to my pilot group when a participant commented that they were looking forward…

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Setting boundaries as a white ally: Why its important, why its challenging and how to do it ethically

NOTE: This post specifically addresses white allies but the principles are transferrable to any allyship relationship. Why we need boundaries: Emotional differentiation My understanding of allyship is that it is a relationship, rather than a one-way transaction. This means that principles of healthy relating apply, including enthusiastic consent and self-responsibility. I believe that these elements…

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